Have you ever heard the expression, “If life is fair, then why do roses have thorns?”
Well, I have. I also think that as far as the injustices go, roses having thorns is pretty unimportant.
First of all, roses don’t have thorns because life is unfair. They have thorns because the first roses with thorns were protected from predators which allowed them to survive and pass on the “thorn trait” to the next generation of roses, who passed it on to the next, and blah, blah, evolutionary, blah.
But don’t get me wrong. I believe the world we live in has more than its fair share of things that are unjust, unfair or just plain wrong. Here’s a list of some true injustices:
- Separating darks and lights while doing laundry is racist and promotes segregation and unfair biases.
- People are totally diggin’ sand all day and night, but then, when people finally take sand home with them, they treat it like garbage.
- Leaving a little bit of milk in the carton so that the next person can have some is a selfless act of generosity and yet it is never appreciated.
- A girl can say “I only like tall guys” and that’s cool. But, if I say “I only fly first class” then I go broke.
- We have no problem giving people, who already have food, a bite of our food. But when an ant, who has no food, wants a bite we fucking murder them.
- Just because bees are an essential part of the environment, we have to protect them, even though they are dicks, and they are willing to kill themselves in order to inflict a small amount of pain on innocent people. Yet, 10,000 years ago, there were peaceful elephant-sized sloths and humans hunted them to extinction without anyone saying ‘boo’.
- We have the right to bear arms but not the right to arm bears… Although, on second thought, maybe that’s a good thing.
- People always say, we should leave a better world for the generations after us, but the people before us managed to evolve from primates. Then they let themselves go generation, after generation, and now primates can beat the shit out of humans, are way better at climbing trees, and have way less debt from student loans.
- Gangsters can wear Loony Toons shirts and look cool and I can’t even dress nice and look cool.
- Weathermen, politicians and Siri are allowed to constantly be wrong and answer questions that are different than the one that was asked, and no one really thinks twice. But, if I do that, even only 1/4th of the time, I get a C on my exam or get fired from my job.
- You need a license to drive a car, but you don’t need a license to tell people that spiders can crawl in your mouth when you are sleeping.