Poking Holes In Common Idioms

It is what it is.”

Not only is this completely redundant, but it also makes you sound as dumb as you are stupid.

You can’t have your cake and eat it too.”

I personally have eaten almost every cake that I have had. I’m not really sure what else you do with a cake… unless you’re that weird cake farts lady. Side note: if you haven’t seen that video, you should, it’s totally gross.

Make sure to stop and smell the roses.”

I try not to do this, A) because I really don’t see roses growing on the side of the road, at least on my regular walking paths and B) because you might be late for something that’s actually important.

“The pen is mightier than the sword.”

Yeah, Ghenghis Khan raped and pillaged half a continent and created the Mongol Empire… with a pen.

 “A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.”

That just all depends on the kind of bird in question. A crow in the hand is worth nothing, and two crows in the bush is also worth nothing. An iPhone with Flappy-bird on it in the hand is worth a butt-load on ebay. Two iPhones with Flappy-bird in the bush is worth two buttloads on ebay… I mean they are sitting in a bush so they are pretty much free for the taking.

“Don’t judge a book by its cover.”

Unless the cover has a an Oprah book club sticker on it… then judge away my friend.

“Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.”

Well that settles it… the egg came first.

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